A couple of my dear girlfriends threw me a super fun shower Saturday, you know, so the boys won’t be stuck wearing princess PJs and glitter shoes. As usual when I’m getting ready for anything more than a normal day, my wardrobe presents a conundrum. My closet is full, but I can’t piece together anything acceptable. I reached for the cutest top I own and that I haven’t worn for too many other events or photo opportunities. The problem was that this top only worked with a pair of jeans, but I don’t think jeans are very showery. So, I hoped some heels and fancy earrings would help pull it together.
When Keith came upstairs, I asked for his valued opinion. His response, “You look fine.” Now, those of you reading this already see the problem, don’t you.
“Fine or good?” I prodded. He said, “You look good.” Oh, you know it doesn’t end there.
My words to Keith are now to all men. (Do men read this blog?) And they apply regarding your observance of any female.
If I look good, the least you can say is “good.” A better choice is “great,” “amazing” or “fantastic.” If I look fine, you might as well say I should go change. “Fine” basically means I’ve met the bare requirements of the lowest standard. No girl wants to look that wretched!
This need for affirmation from my husband reminded me of the two most recent books I finished: Dobson’s Bringing Up Boys and Bringing Up Girls. Hope I didn’t miss the boat on that last one, as Avery is already 4. But, according to the book, it seems like Keith is one who could have missed it. Of course, he hasn’t. He’s the best. However, these books have made me think HE should be the one staying home with our children. He definitely has the most influence. Definitely is the authority God has placed over the 4 of us. Definitely is the most valued opinion. Do I need to go on? Instead of stressing the value of a mother’s role in the life of her children, it is the father who he mentions most frequently. How his presence, words, actions, etc. are paramount in the lives of these precious little ones…and bigger ones too.
The books expressed the same need for children…affirmation and approval from Daddy. So, it’s not just me who is so needy. My kids are too.
Men, I hope you are prepared for the daunting task before you.
Oh, and if you are the parent of either gender, my advice to you is to get a copy of that respective book.